everything's gone green

This was a conversation between two AARP ladies at the salad bar the other day at my office cafeteria.

lady 1: [pointing at guacamole] What is that? Is that green hummus?
lady 2: No, it's guacamole.
lady 1: What is that?
lady 2: You know, avocado and garlic.
lady 1: Huh.
lady 2: It's kind of smoky. [pause, pause, pause] Kind of bacony, really.
lady 1: Hmm. [Looks] Hmmph. [Walks away]

Needless to say, lots of things about that conversation gave me pause. No matter. Onto some scatter shot research and storytelling!

Apparently, the US celebrates "National Guacamole Day" on both Sept. 16 and Nov. 14. This took place in March so there was no official celebration afoot. I was pretty happy it appeared in the work salad bar mix, however. That said, two National Guacamole days? Within two month's time? What gives?

Growing up it always spooked me when a friend's family attempted to grow an avocado plant. The initial germination process looks pretty barbaric. A pit with four tooth picks jammed into it bracing it over a glass of water makes it look like a "hero is about to be mince-meat" scene of an action movie. When the sprouts spring it looks really questionable. The whole set up just looked messy and unnatural to my grade school eyes--like the giant avocado seed was captured, held prisoner, and forced to breed for its hippy jail keepers.

Still looks so brutal to me. It reminds me of The Muppet Movie when Doc Hopper catches Kermit and hands him over to Mel Brooks for a lobotomy.

 

Aaaaaah! Kermit looks so helpless! Cover your face and eyes, Froggy!